Huge congratulations to my friend "L" who had her baby today!! Ever since I gave birth to Jaidin, my friends' birth experiences transport me back in time in such a powerful way...I feel overcome with joy for them, as well as deeply moved by my own memories. I wonder if this will continue or sort of fade as my little darling gets older and my own birth experience isn't so recent.
On a similar note, J had his first taste of "solid" food a few days ago and I finally put my finger on why I have had a nagging reluctance to start feeding solids...it sort of feels, symbolically, like his first step away from me...toward not needing me. I know that's not true, and he will need me for quite a bit longer, but that's the nagging feeling I couldn't pinpoint before...and it occurred to me that day, that the hardest thing about parenting is not going to be any single challenge along the journey -- not the giving birth, not the early days of breastfeeding -- but rather the reality that this tiny precious person is going to, in a way, outgrow his parents. This itty bitty bundle of everything that matters to me in the entire world...it's just so hard to imagine him not needing me the way he does right now. No one will be prouder of his independence and accomplishments than I will be -- I'm not saying I don't want him to grow and flourish. I'm just pointing out this poignant, sort of painful/ironic reality...the child you will spend the vast majority of your life nurturing will move on without you. Of course, it has to be that way. It's just hard to imagine, sometimes.
On a similar note, J had his first taste of "solid" food a few days ago and I finally put my finger on why I have had a nagging reluctance to start feeding solids...it sort of feels, symbolically, like his first step away from me...toward not needing me. I know that's not true, and he will need me for quite a bit longer, but that's the nagging feeling I couldn't pinpoint before...and it occurred to me that day, that the hardest thing about parenting is not going to be any single challenge along the journey -- not the giving birth, not the early days of breastfeeding -- but rather the reality that this tiny precious person is going to, in a way, outgrow his parents. This itty bitty bundle of everything that matters to me in the entire world...it's just so hard to imagine him not needing me the way he does right now. No one will be prouder of his independence and accomplishments than I will be -- I'm not saying I don't want him to grow and flourish. I'm just pointing out this poignant, sort of painful/ironic reality...the child you will spend the vast majority of your life nurturing will move on without you. Of course, it has to be that way. It's just hard to imagine, sometimes.
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